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In true Dudeist fashion, the Old Man responds most quickly to messages that are friendly and not threatening to remove a body part or pee on his rug. He really doesn’t like it when someone pees on his rug. Think about what you want to say. Form your words carefully. You will be judged based on the vocabulary used. Just be chill, okay? Try to not be like Walter. Walter doesn’t know how to chill. Abide, man.

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